The Memory Keeper's Daughter - the book!

initially i did not want to use this sight for a review...i have a separate site for the that: Goodreads.com

but i found myself finishing this one in bed at 430 in the morning, it's been a long while that i stayed up all night to read a good story.

i ended up loving and hating the characters, even if i tried to understand their life-changing decisions. i was one of them wondering what would have happened if that split-second decision did not happen. what-if?

David was a doctor who (forced by circumstances) delivered his twins with the help of his ever dependable ("in-love") nurse, Caroline. This was in the 1960s when mental retardation and Down Syndrome was something not widely accepted by society. Having one in the family could mean giving them away to an institution. And David did just that. choosing to keep his normal, first-born son Paul and giving away his daughter Phoebe to Caroline.

At the last minute, Caroline could not do it, she chose to abandon her earlier life and ran away with the baby. For the next 25 years she would give David glimpses of Phoebe's life through quick notes and snapshots that she would forward through a mailbox. i hated David for this: playing God, for making that decision that would affect the lives of four(??) other people.

Because of family "secrets", the couple (David and Norah) drifted apart and went their own ways. David immersed himself in altruistic doctoral work and photography. His favorite subject were children (girls!) where he could catch glimpses of the daughter he sent away.

After all this time Paul (the first-born) fought for his father's attention, trying to please him yet being himself and living his own life. As a child, he drew a family portrait with his "dead" sister included in the picture. He was gifted in the field of music, performing on-stage professionally.

After David died and the truth came out, Paul and Norah tried to reach out to Phoebe but she is now used to her "old" life and would only call Caroline mother. (this is the part that pained me MOST!)

In the end, Paul decided to give up his old life and be near Phoebe to know her better. I found it unbelievable that Norah (who can't cope with the loss of her daughter for 25 years) and who suddenly finds her alive can just go on with her life. Pack her bags, get married and move to Paris for the next two (2) years. that's hard for normal people and that would be triply hard with a gifted child like Phoebe. How can she know her? let her get used to her if she only sees her once or twice a year.

but overall, this is a book is one with no simple ending. the one that would always be filled with what-ifs. it would always be controversial a one worthy of a lengthy discussion over a casual group of friends.